It's beginning to hurt a lot like Christmas!
Feeling a bit detached from the holly jolly golly Molly holiday? Same here. or are you from the year 9000000 like Doctor Robot where it's just known as update 00163? yeah maybe. well...LET'S WRECK CHRISTMAS TOGETHER!!! There'll be the traditional shithouse Santa photos for the 3rd year running (this year we'll have an elf! and she's pretty frustrated about the whole thing). look... listen... i'm just gonna list the shit now and THEN explain it!
6pm - PHOTOS WITH SANTA AND HIS ELF!!!
8pm - Benito Di Fonzo
8:45pm - Doctor Robot
9:30pm - Sister Ursuline
10:15pm - Santa and his Elf
So... bring your phone and we'll take photos of you with Santa and his Elf to disturb your friends and family then THE MUSIC!!!
Benito Di Fonzo - he's the brain juggernaut behind the Suburban Bukowskis. He's a poet, he's Irish/Italian, he has a hat, his favourite drink is empty and he wrote some Bob Dylan thing. just keep yelling "CHIKO ROLL!!!". he'll like that.
Doctor Robot - in the year 9000000 there are doctors and there are robots but there is only one Doctor Robot. be prepared to be confronted with the FUTURE UTURE uture uture...
Sister Ursuline - our sonic historian and heroine addict bows and plucks and loops with the cello and her alto siren songs until you are under her spell permanently (n.b. it's a pretty good place to be)
Satan and his Elf - SITDOWN OR YOU WON'T GET ANY PRESENTS